Mason's Story Keeps Getting Better

We are one week away from meeting our Mason!

The little tiny clothes have been washed. The crib and play pen pulled together. The car seats loaded in the cars. The bottles have been washed.

All we need is our little Mason to arrive.

In one week we'll head back to the hospital. After a few days we'll come home a family of four.

The last two weeks at home have been the biggest gift from God. We have gotten to enjoy quality time as a family of three. I've gotten to watch my Ethan play and giggle. I've had the chance to snuggle him after he takes his bath. And gotten to kiss him good night. In the morning we greet the morning together.  

I've gotten to kiss my husband good night. And greet him when he comes home from work. I've gotten to hear the "how was your day" stories right in our living room. And been able to be supportive, even if it is from the couch.

A chance to enjoy these slow days before we all dive into the newborn transition phase. You know the one. The days that seem like they will never end. Then all of a sudden you are two months down the road and life is a tiny bit easier. But all the while, there are loads of love, laughs, and snuggles.

I. Can't. Wait.


Before we take the plunge though I want to share the love gift we got from God.

Let's go back to April 16th. We were scheduled for a sonogram. The main purpose: to check Mason's growth and check the placenta placement.

In the 31 days since we arrived at the hospital my body had gone from very irritable and at the verge of going into labor (at 30 weeks!) to calm, calm, calm. blessing #1

There was a magic pill that kept the contractions at bay most of the time. When they were persistent, a magic shot instantly made everything calm again. I'm told sometimes multiple magic doses are needed but one worked for us every single time. 

Mason's heartbeat and movement were monitored daily and he always passed with flying colors. During the entire stay, not once was he ever in danger. Now my body going into labor would have put him in danger. But all along his growth was right on target. blessing #2

The placenta - well it has been the star of the show since December. That's when we found out it had decided to settle in at the very bottom of my belly (aka my uterus). This little discovery kicked our pregnancy up a notch on the risk factor. At the time I was told to just take it easy. It was early in the pregnancy and the placenta could still move. If it didn't then ... 

Best case scenario we would deliver Mason at 38 weeks via C-Section. 

Worst-case scenario my body would try to go into labor and I would have to finish the pregnancy at the hospital. 

So there were lots of sonograms to check on Mason's growth and check the placenta placement. But every time it was checked it was in the same place.... way at the bottom. We kept hoping it would move but it never did. 

Fast forward to April 16th and we expected to see Mason growing beautifully, verify that my body was not in full term labor, and the placenta was way at the bottom. At this point in the pregnancy, the doctor said the chances that the placenta had moved were pretty much zero. If everything checked out as we expected, then we would deliver Mason at 37 weeks where he may need a little oxygen in the NICU but probably not require a long stay.

So that morning in walked the same perinatal doctor that had done the sono 31 days before when we were first admitted.  (They have a huge team and you don't always get the same doctor.)  It was nice to see a familiar face that knew all about our case. blessing #3

In the room, they began to measure Mason.  He checked out beautifully. blessing #4

My body was not in full term labor. blessing #5

Next up - that stubborn placenta. There were three students in the room with us. Which means the doctor was walking them through everything on the screen. Before we got started he said if this baby was born today he would be fine.  A few days in the NICU to wait on his lungs and then home he'll go.  He went on to share our high risk case and what he had seen before. Then the teaching moved on to the placenta. It was mostly doctor speak but I thought I heard that it wasn't where we had seen it last. I tried to hide the shacky-ness I was feeling because immediately I knew - God moved it. But I had to tell myself "Girl get it together! You can not be the crazy crying pregnant girl in front of these students."  

Then the doctor showed us all on my belly where everything was:  Mason was laying horizontally. His head on my right side and his feet to my left. 

The placenta had completely moved to my right side! It now started right below my ribs and carried downward. Just the tail end of it was at the bottom of my belly. Thank you Lord!!! blessing #6

I'll have you know I waited until I was back in my room to ugly cry. Travis said he thought I was joking at first. Not only was this unexpected. It was highly unlikely at this stage in the pregnancy. Only God could do something like this.

So the rest of the day went crazy fast. My doctor immediately got word of the miracle. She called me right away to say I could go home. Still on bed rest but I could go home. blessing #7

Even after learning we were out of the  placenta danger zone, I still didn't think we would be sent home. And honestly that was ok. The important thing was that delivery would now be a lot less tricky!! I just kept thanking God with the biggest smile you have ever seen.

We quickly made plans to move Mason and I home. I was sitting on my couch by 4 pm that afternoon when my sweet Ethan came running through the door. I will never forget the look on his face. It matched every emotion I was feeling.

Now, here we are at home sharing some much needed family time as a family of 3 for one more week. Mason will be delivered at 38 weeks via a scheduled normal c-section on May 12th.


For now we will continue to thank God for each passing day and enjoy just being together in one room - doing life.  

Tales From A Resting Bed

It has been four whole weeks since we began this adventure. When I stop to think of how long that really is  ... I can hardly believe it. I always said bed rest would be SO hard for me. I might have even said impossible.

Thankfully I'm not doing this alone. God is here. And four weeks later I can tell you it is not impossible. And it hasn't even been miserable. There are plenty of books and magazines and blogs and podcasts and puzzles and visits to keep the minutes happy. Then there are Travis and Ethan.

Easter with a  Twist

Ethan has warmed up to the "doctor bed". We snuggle as best we can (the Mason belly has gotten BIG) and play puzzles and read bible stories. Travis makes me laugh through it all and nudges me back over when I'm getting close to the boredom edge. Even though I miss being home with them, I'm glad we get to sprinkle in bits of normal.



Here are a few small tales from the resting bed:

1) Baby ducks :: My room has a wall made up of two patio doors and a big window.

This spring a Mama Duck claimed the courtyard as her home and set up a nest for her 12 little babies. I tried to get a picture but they are just not very good at posing. We are unfortunately down to 5 little ducks now. It's a hard world out there.

The Daddy Duck comes by for visits in the early morning hours. He flies in and sits at the top of the ledge and watches over the entire area. He is ever the protector. It's the neatest thing to watch. The other day he spent most of the day here. I heard a lot of chirping or whatever noise ducklings make and it made me wonder if there was a predator in our midst. But I'm happy to report that we still have 5 baby ducks.


2) Watching Winter turn to Spring :: The leaves have sprouted on all of the trees in the courtyard now. That ledge separates the patient rooms from the waiting area. Every once in a while Mason and I get a curious "visitor".  I just pray for zero eye contact. Soon enough they realize they have gone too far and turn around. Small price to pay for a view like this though. It's been fun getting to watch the seasons change. Admiring nature is definitely one of my love languages. It settles my soul.


3) New friends :: Talking is also another love language of mine. Or maybe it's just part of what makes me happy. I can say that there have been times where I turn to music just so I can use my out loud words!

I've gotten a chance to get to know a lot of the nurses and support staff like the "dining services" ladies. It's so fun to get to catch up with them after not seeing them for a few days. They ask about Ethan and his potty training progress and share kid/grandkid stories with me.  The other day I even got a quick drop in visit from a nurse that got promoted to Day Shifts. She mostly spends time on the other side of the hall so she came in just to say hi and see how we were doing. So Sweet!!


4) Bloggy Friends :: I've gotten a chance to read 3 books and get all caught up on reading blog posts. That's way more than I've gotten done over the last three years! I even got brave enough to reach out to Melanie @ the Big Mama blog and the best part ... She wrote me back!!!  I always claimed her as my friend because well, she's hilarious, lives in Texas, and talks about shopping at H-E-B. Need I say more? Anyhow ... I was so surprised she wrote back. It was the week her latest book was released and I knew she was getting contacted from a million different directions. I really didn't expect a response. But she wrote back!!!  Did I mention that already? Now I really get to claim her as my friend!


5) Art of pillow placement :: I haven't mastered this one yet.  At home I was sleeping with a long body pillow plus two others. And just in case sleep escaped me at 3 in the morning there was a reading chair ready to keep me company. Here I have two pillows. I could ask for more but it already takes a sweet forever to roll myself out of bed. You see these days drinking water is my job and me and the potty see each other VERY often. So honestly two pillows is all I have the patience for. I mean there is only so much room for me, the ever growing Mason belly, two pillows, and the leg cuff things that keep me healthy. And let's not talk about the times I get so wrapped up in what I'm doing that I may have waited a minute too long to start the potty journey. So we'll just keep trying to make these two pillows work. I will say the buttons on the bed help. What's that --  you want to lay down - push a button. Oh, you want to sit up now - push a button. Lower back feels achy - push a button.  Pure greatness!


6) Daydreaming :: I have managed to decorate and redecorate every room in my house via Pinterest. Also I'm surrounded by Beach decor thanks to my friend Tiff. I didn't think I needed decor or things from home but boy! does it make a difference in adding happy to the room. It's inspired me to dream and pin of many future family vacations.

So here's a little tid bit of a side story --- the best part of having girlfriends with kids older than yours is getting to see what is up ahead. It's like the "stay tuned for scenes from our next episode" at the end of your favorite show. My friend Jen has always talked about how her second got to experience outings a lot earlier because you don't just stop your first from experiencing life. So there goes your newborn to soccer games and playdates at the park and such. As a first time mommy I thought this to be so interesting. I can completely see how that happens but would never have occurred to me to expect.

After I became a mom I quickly learned to never say "I would never fill in the blank" because you don't know until you get there. There is no right or wrong way of doing things. There is only the perfect way for your family. So when I hear my best friend tell such stories it intrigues me to see how I'll react. Well, I'm here to say that Mason is definitely going to get some early experiences as soon as mommy is brave enough and ready to go. Maybe not a vacation as a newborn but definitely some fun outings. Besides all four of us are long over due.



So there you have it ... just a few tales Mason and I wanted to share. And now back to that
baby book I have been meaning to finish since before Ethan was born.

What A Story We Will Have

Being pregnant for the second time has been, shall we say, a bit of an experience. Up until last week it was going a little something like this ...

Let's go back to Sep/Oct:

hmmmm, wonder why i need to keep going to the bathroom all of a sudden

and why does 8pm feel like midnight!  SO tired!

It took me a few days to realize that I should probably check to see if I was "with child"... and a few seconds later...

yay!

wait, what?! already?

it took us a sweet forever last time

are we ready for this?

i should probably tell Travis

And then two weeks later...

why do I already look 6 months pregnant? i'm never going to be able to hide this until week 12

are we sure we are ready for this?

all of the bottles... in the middle of the night... no sleep

how will Ethan handle this?

yay! Ethan will have a brother or sister!

And then before I knew it...

finally, second trimester... hooray!  

i can tell people what they already know because wow! i look a million months pregnant

just where is that 2nd trimester boost of energy?

naps... need more naps

it's a boy!  

hooray for two boys!

And finally... 

third trimester! yay!

we are almost done! whew!

why is it so much work to take a shower?

bathroom.  again.  seriously?  

alright... time to get this baby planning show no the road... then again we do have almost everything saved from Ethan... oh let's wait a few more weeks

And then last week happened.

The day my body decided to take a rest... at the hospital... for 6 weeks!

wait, what?!

So here we are hanging out with the nurses and doctors at the hospital until Baby Mason makes his big debut. 

My immediate feeling was shock. Have I mentioned change throws me for a loop? Good thing my husband is great at leading me through the crazy with all of his calm.

And then an enormous wave of sadness took over. I was going to be away from Ethan. I'm the mommy who has only spent 2 nights away from her child. So the thought of not being there to say good morning and watch him crawl into bed was just too much. The tears just kept flowing. Travis and I - we've done apart before. We've done living in different states.  We've done deployment. It won't make it easy but at least we know the emotions and roles to expect. We know what it feels like during the journey and how precious it is when it's all over. But away from Ethan... now that's a new one.

And then God's voice got louder. 

He said it would all be okay, you are in My hands, and I have been preparing all of you for this time. His peace just washed over me. The sad tears kept flowing but fear stayed away and the "what about this" questions were answered.  (by Travis of course because I was the one crying and asking the questions. He was in full problem-solving mode.)

Then I began to see how He had prepared us for this. There have been many things that have happened over the last several months and even years that now make so much sense. Some of them bigger than others but still I believe it was all His preparation. I am so thankful and grateful.

He has set us up to endure this. So we will. 

Like Travis reminded me, we don't know why we are going through this - we may never know this side of heaven. But we do know that we trust Him and He is taking care of us and that it will all be okay. We may not know what the next 6 weeks will look like or what they will bring. But we do know that He will not leave us. 

Ten days later the tears still flow from time to time. But there is peace in my heart. We all miss each other like crazy but we get to see each other a lot! The outpouring of love from our friends and family is unbelievable. For now, the minutes don't seem endless. Thanks to being a mommy for 3 years, there are lots of books and magazines to catch up on. Already the rest has helped my body to finally calm down. We have had one week of uneventful calm. Mason is growing beautifully and hopefully we will get to meet him around April 27th. And what a story we will have for that little guy!

God is good.

the beach

The beach is my very favorite place to be. All year long I am itching to get back and refill my soul.

The first beach trip as a family of 3 was better than I would have ever imagined. Ethan took to the sand and water like a pro. He was fearless. I on the other hand, spent lots of time biting my tongue for fear he would pick up on how scared I was of the waves hitting his tiny little self. He learned of boats and captains on that trip. This year he learned of pirates and it was even better than the first trip. I think one of the greatest joys in life is experiencing a favorite with your child. And even better - learning he loves it as much as you do. He talked about getting back to the beach all year long last year. Even now he asks to go back from time to time. I can already tell the beach is going to give us lots of great family memories.

Ethan was such a pro at the road trip thing this year. There was no need for me to jump into the back seat and set up his own personal theater. Or for me to think of clever ways to entertain him for 7 whole hours. I got to stay in the front seat the entire trip! I was unprepared for so much alone time so I let my thoughts go and even jotted some of them down...

• Vacation means all I have to do is love and take care of my boys.

• Being at the beach reminds me of God. Where the sea melts into the sky... That's where He is. 

• Next to the ocean I feel so small. A small part of this great big earth He created; such a humbling experience. The world washes away with each wave and He fills my soul. Thank you Lord for your waves. Thank you for your love.

• The beach: where the birds look different than they do back home. And the trees are taller. And the houses sit on stilts.

I love watching a storm roll in and during our stay at the beach we had a few.  One of them came in during nap time and I got to sit on the balcony and admire...

• I love sitting outside and listening to the noises of the world. No to-do list in sight - just organic noises of life.  Right now it's thundering. A storm will soon be our afternoon visitor. It is bringing lots of rain with it too. It's going to wash the island clean!

I cannot wait to get back next year!

Finally there is sand beneath our feet

Enjoying our favorite beach dive

road trip!

Love

Cool Cat in his new "Big E" hat from Uncle

Lounging while Mommy & Daddy get "coffee'd up"

Beach Storm

Jumping in sand puddles after the storm

Friends

I love my best friends. 

They are a small group of girls that fill up my soul in so many ways.

Not too long ago I had a late night ice cream date with one of them. We try to do this a few (one) times a year to catch up and laugh sans kiddos. We always meet after bedtime and enjoy a summer night with a yummy treat. It's funny to me that before kids our summer nights involved a meal on an apartment balconyand didn't begin at 8pm.

But that's the beauty of best friends... You create new traditions to stay connected and love continue on each other through all of the seasons.

One of the things I was most excited to share with her was my upcoming baptism. I shared how I had been attending bible study with our pastor. And how beautiful it is to learn about His Word. After every session my response is either "who knew? Or "wow!"   My amazement at His love is a constant in my brain. It's the best kept secret that many already knew.

I have always been a good student. Now don't get me wrong - I was not a straight A or Top Honor kid.  But I love to learn and I feed off the structure and organization it takes to learn something new. And let's not forget the yumminess of new pens and notebooks. So when my bestie asked what baptism meant to me, I reverted back to my good school girls days. I told her about the symbolism of baptism. How holding your breath and being submerged in water represents dying to self. How the water represents the washing away of sin.  How coming back up is the moment of taking your first breath in this new way of life in walking with Jesus. And then I'm sure we got sidetracked and jumped back to a different topic. I don't know about you and your friends but my best girlfriends and I talk in circles. It's one of my favorite things. Or maybe it's just how I talk and they have grown to love me and keep up. 

But ever since that night my response to her question has stayed with me. I feel that I gave an honest good answer. I shared what I learned in one of my studies. It's something I believe in my heart. But it still felt incomplete. 

Since then I have really asked myself this question ... Deep down - what does baptism mean to me?  

It means that I want to share with my family & friends what God and I have been sharing for the past few years and truthfully my whole life. How He has patiently continued to seek me out in so many ways through so many people. How He loved me even while I learned a little about Him and then loved me still when I got distracted by a shiny object. 

Baptism doesn't mean the shiny objects will go away. Or make me perfect from that moment forward. Or keep my reactions to life the way He encourages in His Word. But it does mean that through faith, I trust that He will keep leading me and continue to restore my heart to be like His character. Baptism means that when I fall, I will pray to see myself through His loving eyes and learn how to get up and conquer that fall. It means I will continue to let Him in my heart to help me be a wife, to help me parent my son, to help me be a daughter, sister and friend. Most importantly, to help me share His love with others.

It began with Him seeking me out.

It continued through Bible Study. 

I will declare it through baptism.  

And with His Holy Spirit I will continue to live it. 

Thank you Lord.