What A Story We Will Have

Being pregnant for the second time has been, shall we say, a bit of an experience. Up until last week it was going a little something like this ...

Let's go back to Sep/Oct:

hmmmm, wonder why i need to keep going to the bathroom all of a sudden

and why does 8pm feel like midnight!  SO tired!

It took me a few days to realize that I should probably check to see if I was "with child"... and a few seconds later...


wait, what?! already?

it took us a sweet forever last time

are we ready for this?

i should probably tell Travis

And then two weeks later...

why do I already look 6 months pregnant? i'm never going to be able to hide this until week 12

are we sure we are ready for this?

all of the bottles... in the middle of the night... no sleep

how will Ethan handle this?

yay! Ethan will have a brother or sister!

And then before I knew it...

finally, second trimester... hooray!  

i can tell people what they already know because wow! i look a million months pregnant

just where is that 2nd trimester boost of energy?

naps... need more naps

it's a boy!  

hooray for two boys!

And finally... 

third trimester! yay!

we are almost done! whew!

why is it so much work to take a shower?

bathroom.  again.  seriously?  

alright... time to get this baby planning show no the road... then again we do have almost everything saved from Ethan... oh let's wait a few more weeks

And then last week happened.

The day my body decided to take a rest... at the hospital... for 6 weeks!

wait, what?!

So here we are hanging out with the nurses and doctors at the hospital until Baby Mason makes his big debut. 

My immediate feeling was shock. Have I mentioned change throws me for a loop? Good thing my husband is great at leading me through the crazy with all of his calm.

And then an enormous wave of sadness took over. I was going to be away from Ethan. I'm the mommy who has only spent 2 nights away from her child. So the thought of not being there to say good morning and watch him crawl into bed was just too much. The tears just kept flowing. Travis and I - we've done apart before. We've done living in different states.  We've done deployment. It won't make it easy but at least we know the emotions and roles to expect. We know what it feels like during the journey and how precious it is when it's all over. But away from Ethan... now that's a new one.

And then God's voice got louder. 

He said it would all be okay, you are in My hands, and I have been preparing all of you for this time. His peace just washed over me. The sad tears kept flowing but fear stayed away and the "what about this" questions were answered.  (by Travis of course because I was the one crying and asking the questions. He was in full problem-solving mode.)

Then I began to see how He had prepared us for this. There have been many things that have happened over the last several months and even years that now make so much sense. Some of them bigger than others but still I believe it was all His preparation. I am so thankful and grateful.

He has set us up to endure this. So we will. 

Like Travis reminded me, we don't know why we are going through this - we may never know this side of heaven. But we do know that we trust Him and He is taking care of us and that it will all be okay. We may not know what the next 6 weeks will look like or what they will bring. But we do know that He will not leave us. 

Ten days later the tears still flow from time to time. But there is peace in my heart. We all miss each other like crazy but we get to see each other a lot! The outpouring of love from our friends and family is unbelievable. For now, the minutes don't seem endless. Thanks to being a mommy for 3 years, there are lots of books and magazines to catch up on. Already the rest has helped my body to finally calm down. We have had one week of uneventful calm. Mason is growing beautifully and hopefully we will get to meet him around April 27th. And what a story we will have for that little guy!

God is good.

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